186b Reddit
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Melissa: [00:00:00] Well, Jam, for today's bonus episode, instead of soliciting listener questions, we are going to try something a little different and we are going to ask Reddit.

Jam: Nice.

Melissa: Are you ready for it?

Jam: I'm ready. So we have gone out and found questions

Melissa: Found questions on Reddit that we thought would be interesting to our audience and interesting to think about and discuss.

Jam: And they're interesting. They're weird. There's some cool ones and some strange ones and some very good ones and some ones I've wondered.

Melissa: So this episode's like Reddit asks a chemist. All right, let's, let's do it. Yay, Reddit. Hey, I'm Melissa.

Jam: I'm Jam

Melissa: And I'm a chemist

Melissa: and welcome to chemistry for your life

Jam: the podcast to help you understand the chemistry of your everyday [00:01:00] life.

Melissa: reddit edition Oops, I changed it without asking. All right, great

Jam: and Reddit. So,

Melissa: That's so true

Jam: okay. Are you ready for the first one?

Melissa: Yes

Jam: This one is from a very popular subreddit. Explain it like I'm five, which, you know, we've all wanted things explained like we're

Melissa: That's what I try to do here

Jam: So moles in chemistry explain like I'm five. Hey guys I'm struggling to understand the concept of moles and what isn't most spelled differently by the way.

Melissa: no, I think it's spelled like

Jam: like that. Oh nice And was hoping someone could explain it a lot easier than in previous posts. I understand that a mole is something like of something means that there is 6.

Jam: 022 times 10 to the 23rd of that something, similar to the idea of one dozen equals 12 things. But I don't quite understand when, for example, one mole of nitrogen is 14 grams. [00:02:00] If one mole of nitrogen means that there is 6. 022 times 10 to the 23rd nitrogen atoms, how does one mole of nitrogen equal 14 grams?

Jam: It is saying that 6. 022 times 10 to the 23 nitrogen atoms, one mole of nitrogen is equal to 14 grams since the mass of a nitrogen atom would be super small. And so we use moles to convert it into a reasonable mass for easier calculations. Hope that wasn't too confusing. Thanks everybody.

Melissa: Yeah, so that is the molar mass of nitrogen. So one atom of nitrogen isn't 14 grams. It's what we decided to do to standardize it is it's, it's almost the same as saying like, if we weighed products by their dozen, so like, um, when we say like eggs, way, whatever it be, eggs are actually the weight of a dozen eggs, feathers.

Melissa: A dozen feathers would be a lot lighter than a dozen eggs, and then like a dozen rocks would be a lot [00:03:00] heavier if rocks were a standardized size, I guess, would be a lot heavier than the eggs, right? So that's what, on the periodic table, those little numbers that give the mass is actually the molar mass.

Melissa: So we have just standardized and said, if you take 6. 022 times 10 to the 23rd nitrogen They will weigh this much. And if you take that many hydrogen atoms, for nitrogen it's 14, for hydrogen it's like about one gram. So it's the grams per one mole of something.

Jam: Can I add a question to this? Okay. So like I learned about this in high school and I'm apologizing to Ms. Pittard because what I'm about to ask probably is like something she definitely taught me. But why is it such a random number? Is it because he worked backwards? Mr. Mole worked backwards for something and he was like, I want hydrogen to be a really easy one.

Jam: And so I'm going to pick [00:04:00] 6. 022 times 23rd and then just use that same formula and all the other ones. Because unless you did, unless that was the goal, I'm like, why is this the number?

Melissa: Okay, I had to Google to make sure, but according to Florida State University, this is what I thought. It is basically what you described. So there was a guy named Avogadro, and he was the one who Um, figured this out, 6. 022 times 10 to the 23rd is the number of atoms in 12 grams of carbon.

Jam: There we go. Okay. Big carbon.

Melissa: And so that, that's why.

Jam: Interesting. That, that helps though. Because I'm like, otherwise this is the kind of stuff that I think that frustrates, you know, people like me. It's just like, if something seems arbitrary, it's just like, Oh, why did you make it so annoying? Like, why'd you make such a Weird number, but then it's just that little explanation helps a ton, just, and I'm sure Ms.

Jam: Pittard, [00:05:00] respect because you did a great job. I was just, um, you know, I was, I was young, I was silly, I was texting, whatever I was

Melissa: I was texting, you were texting in high school? I didn't get my first phone, I guess till my senior year of high

Jam: I got one a lot earlier, but it wasn't like a cool one at all. It was because I was like, You know, in band and going to stuff and, you know, getting back late and stuff,

Melissa: Wait, hang on, you were in band. Do I know what instrument you played? I don't know if I remember this.

Jam: see if you can guess.

Melissa: Did you play trumpet?

Jam: No.

Melissa: Were you in percussion? Saxophone?

Jam: Now that,

Melissa: Nailed it on the third time. I don't

Jam: yeah,

Melissa: There are a lot of other instruments though.

Jam: Yeah. I mean, yeah, there really are. I think you did kind of know it in there somewhere.

Melissa: Somewhere in my brain.

Jam: yeah, but it could have taken you a lot longer if you didn't. Um, okay. Wow. That's cool. Is there anything more on [00:06:00] moles? Should we move to the next one?

Melissa: Um, no, I think that's it.

Jam: Okay, so this is a very popular subreddit.

Jam: We're going to, uh, make the title of this subreddit more family friendly. You'll probably know what it is, and if you don't, that's okay. Um, so this is a subreddit that we're going to call Am I the Jerk? Where people, uh, ask questions, genuinely wondering, am I the one who was the jerk, the mean person, the whatever, in this scenario?

Jam: And they pose the question, they explain the story, and ask for people's input. you know, pretty helpful,

Melissa: is helpful, honestly. Although sometimes

Melissa: Reddit's responses are not helpful.

Jam: right, right, right. But you know, we've all been there. We're like, hmm, was I the person? Duh. Gotta honor people asking that question. It's pretty cool. So okay, am I the jerk for telling my sister nobody was interested in her PhD research?

Melissa: I love this question.

Jam: my sister and [00:07:00] I come from a working class family. Nobody in our family has a higher than a high school education, save for us. I have a bachelor's, my sister is currently working on her PhD. Obviously, we're both proud of this. My sister often brags to an extent that too many in my family find uncomfortable or discouraging and she talks down to the people around her.

Jam: When she began our program, she explained it in very technical terms that confused our aunt. When she was asked to clarify, my sister made a fuss about how it was so easy for her to understand and she forgets that not everyone can wrap their heads around

Melissa: Not cute. I don't like it.

Jam: It's been an issue since she started her masters and I've admittedly been at my wits end with her for quite a while.

Jam: I hosted Thanksgiving this year. We were eating, my sister was asked about her research and she went on a long, complicated spiel about her work. Missing context, pulling out every 10 cent word, getting super technical. and [00:08:00] under explaining every concept. She talked for about 10 minutes straight, barely pausing for questions or comments.

Jam: It dominated the conversation. Eventually, I interrupted her and tried asking our dad about his work. My sister interrupted him and said she wasn't finished, and then continued talking. I told her I was finished listening to her

Melissa: Yikes.

Jam: that she could talk all she wanted, but she needs to do it in another room. She made some comments about my hosting and continued on. I stopped her again and told her no one was interested and she needed to be quiet, which she did. It was admittedly extremely awkward and quiet, and my husband decided to just plow on and make conversation with an aunt of mine.

Jam: After that, conversation carried on as usual, my sister being very, very quiet. Afterwards, her parents scolded me for being rude, but said my sister was being over the top. But I should have just let her talk. A few of our other relatives thanked me for cutting [00:09:00] her off. Her fiancé called me yesterday morning and said I embarrassed my sister and made her feel ashamed.

Jam: He implied I was jealous of her success and asked me to formally apologize to her. I said I'd apologize to her, but I wouldn't mean it. And he hung up on me. I've thought, I've thought it over and I can see how my approach was wrong, but I genuinely did not see any other option at the time. Always willing to learn though, and seeking a new perspective.

Jam: What does this chemist think?

Melissa: Okay, I'm gonna say, like a very soft, I think everyone sucks here, but also I think everyone was probably trying, like, like also no one sucks too bad, you

Jam: Right, right.

Melissa: I think, I think that it's harder as a scientist to be able to explain what you do in very simple terms. I actually think that that is a mark of like being a very good science communicator is being and, [00:10:00] and being very intelligent, like, you know, it's easy to make things really complicated. if nobody around you knows what's going on, you know? So I think it's really hard to do what the sister didn't do and what the other, the OP, we'll say the original poster, um, wanted the sister to do.

Jam: mm hmm,

Melissa: So I, I understand both sides because the thing is grad school doesn't teach you how to do that. Arguably the more important skill graduate school doesn't teach you how to do.

Melissa: And so I understand where the sister was coming from and I don't think it was her fault. I think people don't teach that. It's a problem. I think

Jam: right,

Melissa: for those of you who are in academia or grad school or thinking about going or no matter what your job is, you should have like a, what we call an elevator pitch. If you're on an elevator and somebody asks what you do for your job, be able to explain it in very simple terms. Like, when I was in the [00:11:00] OCHEM lab, I'd be like, Oh, I work on making new molecules that are able to basically capture the sun's energy to eventually turn it into electricity. That would be the long term goal, but we're just working on the energy capturing part right now.

Melissa: And if people want to ask more questions, they can, but always give them the out. And so it's just hard because I really see where this, where the sister is coming from of like, this is so boring to listen to and you're not saying anything that's helpful and you're making your, it feels like you're talking down to us.

Melissa: That's not the goal, right? You want people to be able to understand and to enjoy without. Without making them feel, sometimes when people use those big words, I feel less than, and I, I even do have a Ph. D. But sometimes I think, I think that can come from two things, which is, you know, one, either not having a good social awareness of like, oh, this isn't really hitting, people aren't really getting this.

Melissa: Or, you know, or I haven't practiced being able to, to [00:12:00] communicate this, uh, in this way. Or kind of on the other side, I think it can come from insecurity. And so like, maybe coming from a family where not very many people have gotten a PhD, you have to like prove that you deserve to be there, prove that you're smart enough to your family who you feel like, you know, maybe your family, I don't know, they, they like judge you for it, or maybe, maybe you're not good enough, or I don't know.

Melissa: There's all kinds of reasons you could feel that way. But. I feel like I've seen either of those, like, oh, they haven't really practiced that or they're not really getting it, that it's not hitting with these people, or I want to seem impressive so I'm going to sort of like myself up and neither one of them is very helpful.

Melissa: So it is, it's hard. It is really hard. I have, I really do have empathy for the sister who is, has the research and is an Working at that level, but I also understand how miserable it

Melissa: is to be on the other side of that.

Jam: Yeah, it's hard because I was thinking like The way she started initially [00:13:00] trying to change the subject was like really gentle just like, uh, What about you dad? How's your work going? And I think in these kind of settings, It's kind of, when you take it on your feet, it's kind of the best you can do, right?

Jam: But then when that didn't work, It seems like it kind of ended up going the route of like a classic sibling you know, like just the We like when there's something sometimes have the remnants of that the kind of fighting we would do as kids or whatever um and Saying things like what you can talk all you want, but you gotta talk in the other

Melissa: Yeah in your 30s

Jam: yeah, you probably just wouldn't I don't know wouldn't say to Some a different relative maybe you know, or

Melissa: like a friend

Jam: a friend But yeah, so I think it's hard, but it's hard when have you tried other things first that are more natural, social dynamic stuff and it's not working and that's where the social awareness thing comes

Melissa: yeah, and maybe so maybe a good solution would be like, Oh, one on one [00:14:00] talking to the sister about like, when you talk like this, I feel, you know, talk down to our I feel like this, you know, and so you can maybe preempt that next time, or maybe say like, Hey, when you talk like this, I know you're so smart, but like, we're not really getting it.

Melissa: And so it kind of is like, hard to listen to. And that could be a really helpful feedback for your sister to, you know, In her career, but then on the other side, it would make family gatherings a lot more fun, but probably like one on one is the way to have that conversation in a way that's more productive

Jam: totally

Melissa: be less accusing, like not saying, oh, you're jealous or, oh, you're trying to make us feel stupid and, you know, but saying, like, finding more productive ways.

Melissa: It's hard. I really agree. I really have empathy with everyone in the situation because I know grad school doesn't teach us how to talk about our research in a way that's helpful to. People not in the field, and I also know how miserably, miserably boring it can be to be in a room with someone doing that.

Jam: Yeah,

Melissa: [00:15:00] So,

Jam: and how Family gatherings like this can be very difficult No matter who's who's studying what and who wants to talk about what can always be hard

Melissa: Yeah, yeah, for sure.

Jam: This next question is from the separate it Uh, R slash grad school. So more kind of general question, is a PhD worth it? And think we have a person who has gotten a PhD to tell us at least her angle, her side of that. So here's the post. I've been thinking about getting my PhD and have been very gung ho about it for the last two months. I've been proactive about researching different programs, talking to program coordinators and reaching out to professors.

Jam: I've received the fire and brimstone speeches from the professors. Who, who would be my recommenders who say that while they think I'd be a promising competitive candidate, academia would not be a promising career path. That didn't used to get to me. Because I thought I could overcome it, and it would be [00:16:00] worth it.

Jam: But I'm starting to have my doubts. The only reason I'd be getting a PhD is to become a professor, because I think it's the perfect job for me. But maybe that isn't true. On top of all of this, I've been thinking about my finances and the quality of life even more. I live pretty comfortably in a high cost of living area in the U.

Jam: S., can afford to go to music festivals across the country, and enjoy a pretty financially independent lifestyle. And as a matter of fact, I would have to give almost all of that comfort up to get my Ph. D. While I thought it would be worth it before, I'm not so sure anymore. I like my life. I want to buy a home.

Jam: I want to live that double income with a dog lifestyle with a partner one day. Additionally, of all the programs I've looked at, there's only one that feels like an obvious fit for my research interests, which adds to my discouragement in applying. I guess my question for all of you is, does getting a PhD feel worth it for those who want to become professors?

Melissa: Well, that, I feel like that's such a loaded question and it's so hard because with this person specifically, it seems like maybe they're done with school and they're in a [00:17:00] career where they already have the lifestyle that they really want.

Jam: yeah, I guess so.

Melissa: But I think a lot of people would be asking this question who weren't to that place, you know?

Melissa: So it's hard to give a specific answer to this person, but I think I can give an answer in general, which is to say, I don't think getting a PhD is an investment. I think it's a sacrifice in a lot of ways. Um, like one of the things that they don't talk about for you is like the opportunity costs. So, You know, I went to school for four years and then I went to grad school for three more years.

Melissa: Three and a half, actually. And then I switched programs and then had like three more years after that. So I was in school for about seven years and then I started my postdoc, which was, which is like more in line with like a career that my husband, who went to school for four years and got an engineering degree, we made the same salary for me straight out of my PhD and [00:18:00] for him straight out of his.

Melissa: undergrad. And so those, you know, seven years that I invested in grad school, I wasn't making a very good salary. I wasn't able to invest in my retirement accounts. I, uh, at one point, like, some, there's a glitch in my insurance, and so I wasn't able to go to the dentist for, like, two years because you had to wait a certain amount of time before your insurance could be reinstated.

Melissa: And then I have spent literally thousands of dollars on Root Canal since then. So there's, like, all these things that I didn't know that grad school would cost me. What it has given me is a path to my dream career, but I definitely didn't take my dream career for the money.

Jam: Right.

Melissa: And so I think you have to think about, like, not necessarily what dream job is going to make me the happiest, because that is only one aspect of your whole life.

Melissa: But instead, what [00:19:00] job will facilitate my whole dream life? You know, what do I want my life to look like? And for some people I think that is having a job that I'm really passionate about. And I don't really care about the money and then it just enough money to like, you know, have this certain lifestyle with my partner.

Melissa: For other people, I think that's like, I want a job that I love and I want to make a lot of money and I don't really care too much about my home life. Or like, I think for me, what I realized is I want a job that I'm passionate about. But I also want enough time and flexibility that I can spend time with my partner and with if I have kids and with my friends and their kids, you know, and so I want a job that offers a lot more flexibility and I care a lot less about the money, right?

Melissa: So it sounds to me like that's kind of what this person is wrestling with. And I think. For them, I don't know why they think being a professor would be the perfect job for them, but it sounds like [00:20:00] their advisors who really care about this person, who know them, don't agree that it would be the perfect job for them.

Melissa: And there's a lot about being a professor that I think is glamorized. It's like really, really stressful. So it's hard for me to give feedback to this specific person, but I will say for anyone thinking about going to grad school, It's hard. It's a lot. It's a sacrifice. And in some ways it is an investment because you get to get a job that you want, but it's not an investment in like, you know, I think for a lot of professors you end up making, uh, a At the top end, around a hundred thousand, maybe into the one twenties, but it's not a lot.

Melissa: And it's not soon. It's after like five years of grad school at least, and then another two years of postdocing. And then you get to the hiring higher salary, and usually you have to get tenure before you get that, which is another really stressful process. And then you get towards the.

Jam: Yeah.

Melissa: know, so

Jam: It's kind of like when people talk about doctors making a lot of money and it's like, yeah, but before they made a lot of money, they got [00:21:00] into a lot of debt, you know, and like most of them, you know? And so it's one of those things where you can't just look at a salary and be like, well, Awesome. Not that that person says that, but I think people like me from the outside might be like professors are making all kinds of money and having tenure and stuff.

Jam: And it's like, well, they also sacrificed a bunch of years and, and made not much while they were in those years of getting it. Right.

Melissa: And like, for me, I don't regret it. For me, it was worth it to get a PhD because I want a job that I love. And I think teaching people is a job that I love. And I have a lot more avenues to teach people in a way that's a lot more satisfying than teaching like at high school

Jam: Mm hmm.

Melissa: So for me, I'm like, yep, I have a job that I love.

Melissa: It was definitely worth it. But I don't know for this person. You know, or for a lot of people, is it really necessary for you to have this thing for the career that you would love that helps facilitate the lifestyle overall that you want? [00:22:00] It's tough. It's a tough ask.

Jam: Uh, can I add this little update that they put

Melissa: Oh, sure. Yes. I love an

Jam: I think it was better to hear your answer first, but they said update. Edit. I hear the overwhelming consensus is don't pursue this. Don't pursue this. Heard. So,

Melissa: do it. I wonder if there was more information, like in the comments of explaining to like what that person does and what field they're in and stuff.

Jam: is the kind of stuff that would be helpful to know, but yeah. That's, yeah, yeah,

Melissa: Yeah. It is definitely, it's an investment, but it's also sacrifice. That's funny.

Melissa: That's a good thing. Okay. Well, do we have any more? I think that might be all of them.

Jam: that's it for this one,

Melissa: Great. Well, if you guys like this, I think we're going to plan to do more of these. I think we might keep them mostly on our Reddit or sorry, on our YouTube channel for Reddit readings, and then go back to regular bonus episodes in the future and probably also make them available for our patrons.

Jam: [00:23:00] so if, if this is a hit, hit, you can find them on our YouTube channel, and then if you're one of our patrons, you'll find them there, but we may not put them in our typical podcast feed, we'll do our usual bonus episodes there, but let us know what you think,

Melissa: Let us know. If you're obsessed with them, maybe we'll put them here too. Who knows? We love to hear from you.

Jam: yes,

Melissa: Vote in your reviews.

Jam: yes, and some of you guys do, so, uh, what, how should we close out?

Melissa: I don't

Melissa: know. How do we normally? Yeah, just the usual. Nice.

Jam: idea, comment, something like that, something you wonder if it's chemistry, that you'd want to be included in our usual Ask A Chemist episodes, or maybe an idea for a full episode, you can reach out to us on our website at chemforyourlife.

Jam: com. That's chemforyourlife. com to share your thoughts and ideas. If you'd like to help us keep our show going, contribute to cover the cost of making it, get access to cool stuff, exclusive things. You can join our super cool [00:24:00] chem community of patrons on patreon. com slash chem for your life That's patreon.

Jam: com slash chem for your life to help keep the show going and to be in our little chem immunity and get to get to know us better. I was good to know you better. That kind of stuff. It's, it's a lot of fun. So you can do that. But if you're not able to, you can still help us by subscribing to our podcast app rating right.

Jam: It can be an Apple podcast. And I think actually Spotify added reviews now. So review there too. And you can also also help us by subscribing to our YouTube channel and, you know, throwing a comment over there too. Bye. Those things help us to share chemistry with even more people, help to spread the chemistry love around.

Jam: So, uh, please do that.

Melissa: This episode was made possible by our financial supporters over on Patreon. It means so much to us that you want to help make chemistry accessible to even more people. And those supporters are John T, Avishai B, Brie M, Brian K, Carol R, Chris and Claire S, Chelsea B, Derrick L, Elizabeth P, Emerson [00:25:00] W, Hunter R, Jacob T, Christina G, Katrina H, Latila S, Lynn S, Melissa P, Nicole C, Rachel R, Sarah M, Stephen B, Suzanne P, Timothy P, Venus R, Erica B, Cullen R, and Jeanette N.

Melissa: Thank you again for everything you do to make chemistry for your life happen. And an extra special Yeah, and extra special thanks to Brie who often makes illustrations to go along with episodes of Chemistry for Your Life.

Jam: Yeah, chemistry!

Melissa: Yay chemistry!